Is heavy, passionate kissing adultery?

[Blitzy]

Hello, first is my first post on this forums, I'm from a church of christ congregation over in New Zealand.

I'm trying to find the answer to the following question:

If a married person (not me ) lusted after and started passionately kissing someone other than the person they are married to, is that committing adultery? (repeatedly lustful kissing with some fondling of non-private areas involved)

thanks

[Hunter]

Blitzy

Adultry can be other than sexual intercourse.

If you are painting a room white and someone comes along and adds a spoonful of red to your white paint they have committed adultry by adulterating your paint.

Consider if the person you are talking about was doing all that kissing and inappropriate touching to another person of the same sex, there would not be sexual intercourse possible, but still the sacred marriage vows have been violated or adulterated.

I know fornication is commonly used for before marriage sex and adultery for married people, but that needs to be rethought in my opinion.

[trikard]

On my first trip to Latin America I discovered the custom of greeting with a kiss. As a hot blooded 18 year old I was pretty happy when a girl I liked was going to greet me with a kiss. Just when I was about to get my kiss my brother in-law interrupted us! He then (quoting Romans 16:16 no doubt) said to me in English, “Let it be a holy kiss my brother.”
Holy, in is very essence, means to use something for a special purpose. So if we are married a passionate kiss is holy because it is in the context God intended it. for our spouse. While a passionate kiss for someone else would be unholy. This is why Paul gave this gave this restriction.

I think the person you are dealing with is going to reject the idea of kissing being adultery and other might support him.
The way I would approach it is this: One, this is not holy behavior for a married man. Two, it is defiantly a step towards adultery. Three even a non Christian would say what they are doing is not wrong for a married person. Approach this like any other sin. Tell him, and then take two or three more if he does not repent. Then if he does not listen, tell it to the church.

So in short is this adultery? I believe you will get a lot of fruitless arguing on both sides if this is the question. Now, is this unholy, sinful activity for a married man? Absolutely!

[Blitzy]

Thanks for the replys, both were definately helpful.

Your both right in that people would argue (and already have) both ways to say that fornication definitions in the bible all involve mention of the bed being defiled and that it is the process of 'laying' with another and becoming 'one flesh' which if taken literally would mean intercourse.

I was thinking though; Mathew 5:28 says that lusting after another is committing adultery in your heart. James 1:5 would say that when that lust is 'conceived' then it becomes sin. Which would mean to me that the penalty of adultery would apply once it was concieved.

I would definately say this person has lusted after the other (admitted to the lust and desired to do this with the other) and acted on that lust. So would it be logical to say that since Jesus considers that lust is adultery then anything concieved from that lust, whether it be intercourse or just kissing, is also adultery?

Seems to make sense to me but I'm not sure, I may just be seeing more into it then there is. The other possibility is that the lusting after another that Jesus is talking about is just the thinking about having intercourse with the person and that imagining kissing someone would not be lust? unfortunately the verse leaves that in a bit of a grey area

if is definately cheating on the persons spouse and I would have thought that adultery was any form of cheating.

also on a point of something mentioned, it actually is a same sex incident involving two women.

anyway, tell me if you think I'm on the right track or not

thanks,
Blityz

[Hunter]

Yes, its fornication and adultery.

Two women, what a waste of good womanhood and there's a shortage.

I'm thinking this post is a joke on us!!

[Blitzy]

yeah I wish it was a joke

ok well thanks for the replies. I'm pretty confident in my understanding of this matter now. Unfortunately many people whose knowledge of the bible I would trust just don't want to get involved. Too complicated for them I guess, they likely don't want to be responsible for giving out the wrong advise.

thanks,
Blityz

[trikard]

Wow, how sad. It sounds like this behavior is right out in the open? Do you have a minister or elders? One of the things I ask is would you want our minister, elders, church leaders ect (or in this case their wives) to have this behavior? Unfortunately it sounds like people are saying let sleeping dogs lie. You know who came up with that saying don’t you? An old dog! I would also look at some passages like Romans one, "Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones..." Shameful lust is a interesting expression. For me as a 18 year old boy to have desire for girls was healthy and natural, as long as it did not go too far. This is a fine line here. However, for women to have desire for woman falls into the catagory of shameful desires. I think your right on track too with the Matthew passages on lust.

[jessie]

its said in scripture(not exact quote)...if a person thinks about committing adultry, its the same as doing it. the commandment is :thy shall not commit adultry...i cant believe they are doing heavy kissing and not having this on their mind. DO YOU REALLY THING THIS IS WHAT GOD WANTS?